My friend Adrienne posted this on her blog. She and I had talked about it before but I love how beautifully she put this into words. I am so lucky that she is my friend! I have gleaned her wisdom since 2003 and plan on doing it for many years to come!
So, from January to April this year I entered into a Biggest Loser contest with about 20 other friends and neighbors. I did not win, but somewhere in the middle of the contest I had a realization and the results of the contest confirmed that realization for me.
My dear friend really committed to this contest! 1000 calories a day and rigorous 45-90 minutes of exercise 6 days a week. She was completely devout for 90 days. Result: she looks fabulous and lost over 5% of her body fat. Go team!
My other friend and neighbor pretty much ignored the contest until the last three weeks. By the midterm weigh in she had made zero progress. Her competitive nature kicked in for the last three weeks and she lost almost 9% of her body fat and she was thin from the outset. Hooray for her too!
What was my realization? I am spending a lot of my life and time chasing after other people's talents. My skinny neighbor obviously has a talent for fitness. It comes easy to her. 3 weeks focus did more for her than 12 weeks did for my other friend.
I am not saying that I am now in pursuit of an oompa loompa shape. I still want to be healthy and energetic. However, obtaining a six pack is probably not in my capabilities. I am by nature soft. Plus, if I spend all that time to get to that mythical ideal, then what? Do I want that to be the focus of my day- everyday? Is this what I want my life to be about?I am beginning to realize through many of my self doubts, that I actually have a few infant talents of my own. Would three weeks of focus on these talents yield me a victory? Maybe.
Plus I am evaluating the things for which I wish to be remembered. When I am gone, do I want my kids to remember that I was in good shape? Well sort of. . . but what if they had a collection of scrapbooks about our whole family to remember me by? Or a beautiful quilt to wrap their children in, made by their grandma? Or a story they could read that I wrote to entertain them?Or a beautiful photograph that would help them see through my eyes the things that I valued? Or even a family recipe that they can make for their kids on those special occasions and remember that I did the same for them?
So, I found myself at a fork in the road at age 43. Trying to decide whether to pursue the body obsession that has long haunted me or to move to a different road? I am choosing the new road. It feels wonderful and a little scary. Failing at something new is scary, but not as scary to me as a life spent chasing after other people's talents and burying my own.Wish me luck.
2 years ago
4 comments:
You are so far from 43 years of age!
WOW Adrienne!! I am not to that point yet where I feel ready to take the new road and leave the other one behind, but much of what you said speaks loudly to me too. I have so many desires, dreams, infant talents that I want my kids to remember me by and I don't want my pursuit of my six pack or thighs that don't touch to be all there is in the end. Thanks for the reminder. Good for you in finding what works for you. That is inspiring, even if our paths are all different.
Sorry Christie, I read this and knew that your friend had written this on her blog; however, I thought you had taken her thoughts and written yours from it. She is probably 43. :O)
There is space between my ears some of it is empty.
No worries!
Post a Comment