I am liberated.I have decided to be honest with you all- to be me. I'm not going to censor myself and be more conservative than I really am. Who am I trying to fool anyway? God knows my heart and I feel like I can say without reservation that he likes me. Neither will I censor myself spiritually. Not writing about things of a spiritual nature in my life is too difficult. Trying to separate my spirituality from myself like oil and water is like trying to remove my gender or the color of my eyes- impossible.
So this is me.
I love God. I doubt. I like coffee flavored Jelly Bellys. I would give up everything (and have at times) for things I believe in. I think Dr. Pepper is wonderful and that we probably drink it in heaven. When I'm alone in the car I like to jam out to songs like, "Nearer my God to Thee," and Jon Schmidt. Every once in awhile- okay, daily- a shit, damn or hell escapes my lips. I have missed Stake Conference purposely. I think the ordinances of the gospel- like taking the sacrament and temple worship- are beautiful not only because of their truth but because there is something wonderful about belief, culture, ritual and worship. I believe that the Gospel and Church are interwoven but not synonymous. I believe in kindness and taking care of each other. I think that it's okay to eat out on Sundays when you're on vacation. I believe in ghosts. I know that God lives. He knows and loves me. I believe that the Gospel of Jesus Christ is perfect, but that people aren't. I don't think that the culture of Mormonism is the same as the Gospel. I am a conservative feminist and even though I'm a devout republican, I may have voted for Hillary Clinton over John McCain had that been the choice. I think it's just fine for little girls to wear short shorts and tank tops. I don't believe in censorship: I do not have the right to tell others what to say/not say and they do not have the right to tell me what to say/not say. Like it or not, things aren't always black and white.
This is who I am. I am free.
13 comments:
Love you Chris.
And by the way, I too, love you just the way you are. I'm glad that we all come in different flavors with different likes, dislikes, beliefs, etc. The world would be a boring place without those differences.
To your critics...She may be different from you, in some ways she's different from me, and yet she's my best friend...what can you possibly dislike about this girl?
Wow, Christie, I'm shocked! I now realize that you are a pretty normal LDS woman. I agree with a lot of the things you said, but I can't accept the idea of drinking Dr. Pepper in heaven... I'm sure it will be Coke ;o) BTW I think you are awesome!
I love this--love love LOVE!
xox
Christie, you are an amazing person! You are loved and admired just the way you are. The world could use more people like you. And I completely agree with Dr. Pepper in Heaven! :) I love you and miss you tons!
You go girl.
You are amazing!
hooray for honesty.
i love your new pict on the side. Are you not beautiful???
Dear Christie,
You are AWESOME!! I am so grateful you are my friend.
That is all.
Christie, you have shared so many things in this post that are exactly how I feel, but I can't say in my family in order to keep the peace.
Hopefully your critics can realize that we are all different and think different and that is okay. It is what makes humanity such a beautiful tapestry.
Props for standing up for who you are and what you believe.
Hi dear friend,
You know the definition of integrity, and you live exactly true to what you know to be true and that is a beautiful thing.
It is also beautiful to watch you give yourself the freedom to change your mind as you learn more truths and then be just as strong in your new found convictions.
Growth and knowledge are freedom. You are truly free.
Love you!
Amen.
Sounds like we have a lot in common.
:)
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