I wouldn't necessarily classify myself as an "overly modest" person persay. I don't have a bubble and I don't shock easily. That said, I'm not into group nudity.
At Heaven (aka Treehouse Athletic Club, the Gym where I work out) there is a genreal love by the patrons of nudity. It doesn't really bother me, it just means that the little changing rooms are usually empty and I don't have to wait to use one. Last night my friend Christie (great name, great spelling, I know. I tell her all the time!) and I were in the steam room discussing group nudity and decided that naked at the gym is "bad naked" and there are very few- if any- exceptions.
FAST FORWARD LESS THAN 24 HOURS
After my killer run with Christie last night and the hamstring butt kicking I got from Eve (my trainer) on Tuesday, my legs today resembled dried rubber cement- which isn't anything stable at all. In short, I'm in agony here. So after my work out and eucalyptus steam today, I stood in my comfy robe and stared at the sports whirlpool (oh yes my friends a "sports" whirlpool with jets so strong they'd knock your socks off if you were wearing them). I thought of my aching muscles and the joy of soaking in said pool. The following is my self talk complete with the angel/devil on the shoulder:
Devil Self: No one has been in this locker room but you for the past 30 minutes. And the gym is basically empty, who'd walk in and see you?
Angel Self: But you'd be naked.
Devil Self: But even if you were naked, the industrial strength jets would be on and no one would be able to tell.
Angel Self: But you'd be naked.
Devil Self: People are naked in here all the time. Old people. Young people. Skinny people. Fat people. (You get the picture)
After ten minutes of inner turmoil I decided, "What the HEY!" I turned on the jets, lost the robe and popped in. The choir in my head sang the "Hallelujah chorus." It was bliss. Just as I'm about to heave myself out of the water a group of women come in, and decide that right in front of the whirlpool is a great location for their in depth conversation.
We return, dear reader, to the Angel/Devil where the Devil sheepishly admits defeat.
Angel Self: I TOLD YOU YOU'D BE NAKED!!!!!
Devil Self: Okay but at least the jets are still on, no one knows you're naked, just wait it out, they have to leave sometime.
TIME LAPSE 17 minutes. The chatty women are still chatting.
Angel Self: What is that sound- or rather LACK of sound- is that? OH NO, I THINK IT IS!!! The Jets are turning off...
Devil Self: I got nuthin.
My arms each take a zone (providing very little coverage to my front side and absolutely NO coverage to my rear) as I flee to my robe, fumbling in shame. I put the darn thing on (inside out no less) and frantically run to my locker where I dress in all my humiliated wetness.
And that my friends is how I today became the accidental exhibitionist. On the bright side, my legs feel the itty bittiest bit better. SHEESH!
2 years ago
3 comments:
Great story. I feel like I haven't laughed in days, so it felt good to finally do it. (Not at your expense, of course.)
You are so funny!!! I wouldn't have been so gutsy! I am just sorry you got stuck for so long!
Hope you don't mind my posting in an old thread!
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I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. Locker room nudity is completely acceptable and common in most women's locker rooms that I've been in. In fact at the health club that I workout at and the YWCA that I take my daughter swimming at you attract more attention and odd glances at you if your not naked, literally.
At my health club the women all seem to love to stand around having long conversations while standing there totally nude, and they also seem to love doing things like blow-drying hair (and not always just the hair on their heads to be brutally honest) and apply makeup while totally naked.
And the YWCA that I take my daughter swimming at is the exact same way with the same kind of locker room routines.
But the occasion that stands out in my mind the most was when my daughter was in the third grade. On the last day of school before the kids started their two week Christmas vacation the teacher arranged to take all of the girls swimming at the YWCA, and a few of the dads to take the boys bowling. A couple of weeks in advance the teacher had requested that a few of the parents who did not have day jobs tag along to help assist the children and keep an eye on them for safety reasons.
I was the only mother who was able or at least willing to assist the teacher. Since I was the only mother able to attend, the teacher had her 14 year old daughter get out of school early and come along with us
Now, here's the "exhibition" part...
As soon as we entered the women's locker room at the Y the teacher quickly started getting undressed. That wasn't surprising or shocking to me because I figured she was going to change into a swimsuit, which she did.
But here's the surprising thing to me... As soon as she finished getting 100% undressed without a single stitch on she started addressing the girls in the class with all kinds of rules which took a few minutes to go over everything. I fully understand her stating her's and the Y's rules, but I wondered why she didn't do that either before she undressed or after she put on her swimsuit? The swimsuit was right there next to her, nothing was stopping her from putting it on, but instead she decided to stand there for 3 or 4 minutes totally nude going over the rules.
The only explanation I can come up with is that it was the Y's rule that everyone had to shower-off really quickly before entering the pool and she figured she'd shower-off in the nude instead of in a swimsuit, which she did. Maybe she forgot to state the rules to the kids before she got undressed, and then remembered just as she finished getting undressed? I don't know?
Then after the swim her daughter did a very similar thing. The teacher told her daughter to help the young girls open their locked lockers. The daughter decided to take off her swimsuit and walk around nude from locker to locker opening them up for the girls which took her at least 6 or 7 minutes to do. My only conclusion there is that the daughter didn't want to be tracking water all over the locker room while she opened the lockers, and she did then take a nude shower after she was done helping the girls.
Hope you don't mind the long post either!
Take care.
Carol.
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