Slipping through my fingers all the time.

Tomorrow I will post a long letter to Libby detailing her accomplishments in the past year and how very much she was wanted. I love my kids' birthdays and I love celebrating with them, but I admit to a secret. The night before my girls' birthdays I always decorate the house and cry. I mourn for their growing up, so that I can spend the entire next day in joyous rapture. To be a mother is to rip a band-aid off slowly, over an eighteen year period. It hurts and heals. For every second you have with them is a second less in your collection of moments. Another one of life's great balancing acts I suppose. Today I've been humming that song from Mamma Mia all day, "Slipping through my fingers all the time I try to capture every minute..." They are slipping away, but I am so grateful that as they slip, I grab on to tiny pieces that will never leave me- remaining always in my mind. They are what I will have forever and even take with me when I go.

Slipping Through My Fingers by ABBA

Schoolbag in hand, she leaves home in the early morning

Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile

I watch her go with a surge of that well-known sadness

And I have to sit down for a while

The feeling that I'm losing her forever

And without really entering her world

I'm glad whenever I can share her laughter

That funny little girl

Slipping through my fingers all the time

I try to capture every minute

The feeling in it

Slipping through my fingers all the time

Do I really see whats in her mind

Each time I think Im close to knowing

She keeps on growing

Slipping through my fingers all the time

Sleep in our eyes, her and me at the breakfast table

Barely awake, I let precious time go by

Then when she's gone there's that odd melancholy feeling

And a sense of guilt I cant deny

What happened to the wonderful adventures

The places I had planned for us to go

Well, some of that we did but most we didn't

And why I just don't know

Slipping through my fingers all the time

I try to capture every minute

The feeling in it

Slipping through my fingers all the time

Do I really see whats in her mind

Each time I think I'm close to knowing

She keeps on growing

Slipping through my fingers all the time

Sometimes I wish that I could freeze the picture

And save it from the funny tricks of time

Slipping through my fingers...
Slipping through my fingers all the time

Schoolbag in hand she leaves home in the early morning

Waving goodbye with an absent-minded smile...