Happy First Birthday Christian!

Dear Christian,

Today you are one year old.  One year.  How does it seem that you’ve been with me always?  My little son.  My baby son.  The joy of my life.

You are a content little soul.  You’ve been the best natured little baby.  You go with the flow and are very flexible.  You spend time in the car shuttling your sisters to and fro to their various activities with a pleasant spirit.  You don’t have high highs or low lows.  This contented nature has been a gift.  As contented as you are, you are the most stubborn boy!  You want what you want and there is no convincing you otherwise.  I’m so thankful you are a stubborn soul.  You demanded to be born!  What if you hadn’t?  What if I had given up?

You don’t love to sleep.  Part of the problem is your mamma that is all too happy to run to your side at the faintest peep.  So you’re a little spoiled…who cares!?!  You just started sleeping through the night last week and I’ve been exhausted for a year!   

You don’t love Broccoli and whenever you find a new food that isn’t your favorite you “generously” remove it from your mouth and try to force-feed those around you!  You love watermelon and grown up food in general.  You love squash and bananas.  You aren’t very good at your sippy cup.  You much prefer your “boobies” and it breaks my heart that this beautiful, bonding phase of breastfeeding is nearing its end.

You love baths but HATE getting changed or dressed, especially when it involves a shirt going over your head!  You love the sunshine and sitting on our trampoline watching the birdies fly by.   You love your blankie with the blue bears on it.  You love hugging your stuffed animals.  You love playing cars and dinosaurs.  Your nicknames include but are not limited to, bu-bu, bubbs, c-dog, c-c, bubbskin and beebee.

You love your family, and we all ADORE you!  Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends and of course your immediate family.  You have four people wrapped around your finger in this house.  Your face lights up whenever a different family member enter the room.  Your giggles are the sweetest.  Your sisters are your playmates and I know you’ve loved them for so much longer than this year.

Oh, your daddy.  Do you know how amazing it is to see him with you?  Our third child and yet it never gets old to watch him with his babies.  He loves having a little boy and feels like the luckiest guy to have you.  He can’t wait to include you with the girls on all of his Adventures.  He also can’t wait to teach you how to throw a ball, catch a fish, hike a mountain, be a man. 

Hi.  Hi was your first word (after dada and mama).  I have it recorded right after you said it.  It was exquisite.  How lucky I’ve been to experience all of these sacred firsts.  You play peek-a-boo and Patty Cake.  You blow kisses and wave.  You also shake your finger at me when I tell you no-no.  (Defiant little demon!)  You love waving to the bus as Libby goes by and squealing ee-ee when Hailey walks in the door in the afternoon.  Right now you are crawling, army crawling, pulling up to stand and walking around the furniture to get where you want to go.  Walking is just around the corner.  You are a menace!  One day last week you pulled a huge glass of water over, broke a candle on the tile floor, climbed up two sets of stairs, threw a container of cottage cheese onto the grocery store floor (which exploded everywhere), pulled down the fireplace screen, and dumped out my spice cupboard!  Yes, all in one day. 

You’re exhausting.  And yet, I fall into bed each night worn out from loving you and your sisters and feel so blessed.  You children are my first thoughts in the morning and you are the last thing I see on the backs of my eyelids as I fall asleep.

Thank you for this first year of life, my baby.  Thank you for being born.  Thanks and Praise be to God who heard the earnest pleadings of my heart.  The Doctors?  They all told us that No, you would never be.  They told me repeatedly.  Everyone gave up.  But you and I?  We knew differently, didn’t we?  We were persistent and stubborn and crazy and reckless.  You demanded to be born.  And I said I would make it happen.  It wasn’t easy.  It’s still painful to remember.  But that raw pain is eased with the salve of loving you every moment.   You are my miracle and I’ll love you always.  Happy Birthday Baby Son.

Love,

Mamma